Responsibility for our lives

nothing holds us back but us.

You are responsible for everything that is in your life. Hard to swallow? Bring up blame and guilt? Take a deep breath and read on.

We tend to want to think other people or circumstances are at fault when life doesn’t go right for us; and when that doesn’t work we waste energy blaming and beating ourselves up for being wrong somehow. The truth is that everything that is in our lives (including terrorist, wars, poverty, and famine but we won’t get into that quite yet) is what we attracted. That’s the bad news and the good news; because if we attracted it like a magnet then we can demagnitize it as well.

There are many ways taught to do that. Most of them start with accepting that what is here is here because of us. Acceptance means no blame, no judgment – we just accept that it is. If we can’t take this step; if we continue to blame; there is virtually no way out. We can’t change anyone but ourselves and blaming says I’m wrong or they’re wrong and either way we see ourselves as a victim and perpetuate the cycle. Circles are eternal. Accepting that we have drawn what is in our lives in is difficult mainly because once we accept it we realize – again the good news and the bad news, that we are the only ones that can change it. In order to change it we have some work to do.

This is the second step; being willing to change.  It would be so much easier to improve my life if only they would change. Why should I be the one to change? (If you’re asking this question go back to step 1!)